Category Archives: love

Dealing with the Doldrums: Downtime and the Actor

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Taken on a morning run along Lake Michigan.


Yes, yes, I’m late again. My dog had surgery back in my hometown so I had to take her down south, return for rehearsal, and then drive back to get her. I know, excuses, excuses.

The Doldrums “is a colloquial expression derived from historical maritime usage, in which it refers to those parts of the Atlantic Ocean and the Pacific Ocean affected by the Intertropical Convergence Zone, a low-pressure area around the equator where the prevailing winds are calm…. The doldrums are… noted for calm periods when the winds disappear altogether, trapping sail-powered boats for periods of days or weeks.” Wikipedia. 

I am in the midst of my own Doldrums. I’m not sure how it is for other people, but my acting cycle tends to come in starts and stops. I will have a hellishly busy (read wonderful) week where I feel like I can barely breathe for all the auditioning, filming, and rehearsing, my sink gets full of dirty dishes, and my tiny apartment looks like a hurricane blew through. (Nautical theme today, happy summer y’all). Then, the next week, nothing. Not a single audition. I try not to let despair set in. I know that eventually there will be another audition, this town is so full of theatres how could it not happen? It’s a numbers game, and I haven’t been here long enough for them all to hate me (<– Bad state of mind. Avoid this!) So I try to use the time to learn about other areas of this business and to catch up on some good TV and film.

For example, I recently finished The Screenwriter’s Bible. I’m interested in the process, and have a few ideas kicking around in my head. So I started a screenplay. We’ve talked about content creation and my doldrums are the time when I try to create more. To be perfectly honest, it doesn’t always work. I tend to be massively inefficient when I’m not busy, but I know this about myself and am, sort of, working on it. 

I also use the time to catch up on TV and film that I’ve not seen. I love entertainment. Obviously, right? Observe what I’m doing with my life. I think it’s valuable to be exposed to lots of different styles and genres. I learn something from every actor’s performance that I watch. I even base (steal) some characters that I audition for on tics that I’ve seen other actors do. Right now I’m on a TV kick. I recently burned through the first season of Rectify. The show breathes. It’s slow and methodical and the performances are absolutely amazing. It’s tempting to say that nothing much happens, but it’s rare for a show where the characters get to spend an entire episode, heck, a season, feeling. I cannot recommend it enough. Then, I tore through the first two seasons of Arrow. So. Good. I love that show and am obsessed with #Olicity. It’s going to happen. But, I digress. Arrow is a completely different show than Rectify. It barely has room to breathe with the 45 minute action movie that every episode presents. But, I still find the characters to be compelling and the acting super solid. Different styles, different lessons.

Basically, I’m always trying to learn something about this craft that I love. Next up on my reading list is The Filmmaker’s Handbook: A Comprehensive Guide for the Digital Age. It’s probably going to take me awhile.

How do you all deal with the doldrums?     

Phantom of the Opera at Albert Hall

I happen to adore overwrought, melodramatic, emotionally manipulative pieces of theatre. Given this proclivity, it’s no wonder that my favorite musicals include Phantom, Les Mis, and Jekyl and Hyde (I’ve only ever seen the David Hasselhoff version if that tells you anything). Give me dark corners and dark deeds set to a minor key, and I’m a very happy girl.
I have no idea how I missed the fact that there was a recording of the Phantom of the Opera at Albert Hall. I found it by accident while flipping through Netflix. It. Was. Awesome.
Maybe the production was so amazing to me because when I’ve seen the show I’ve always been too far away to really notice any subtleties in the actors’ performances. Or, maybe it’s because no one performs Erik like Ramin Karimloo.
I’ve never really liked the Phantom, as a character, all that much. He’s obsessive, controlling, and a murderer to boot. Watching Karimloo, I saw a humanity that I’d not associated with Erik. I’ll give a couple of examples for illustration.
My absolute favorite part of this production was in “Point of No Return.” The Phantom is posing as Don Juan, sitting at the tavern table. Christine runs her hands up his arms, or some such, and his hands shake. That’s it. Shaking Hands. Desire, longing, and a loss of control in minuscule body movements.  Beautiful.
Also, the inner emotional life behind his eyes the entire show. Even when he’s still there is a lot going on. He imbued his performance with a vulnerability that I haven’t seen in the role. It reminds me of why I love theatre. 
Watch it.
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